Upset, Subset, Reset

I went to a pilates class today and at one point the instructor said we should take our balls and before she could say the next instruction one lady exploded complaining loudly about how she did not have a ball or a block.She was so upset but the instructor calmly asked if anyone in the class had an extra ball or block. One was found and given to her. However, her explosion had made her look silly and irrational when the solution was so easy.

I, however, was sure that her explosion was not really about the piece of equipment she did not have. Have you heard the story told about a man who got stopped by the police and given a speeding ticket? In that anger (which he thought was justified because he was speeding in order to achieve a good thing), he told off his next in command when he got to the office who also in that anger told off his secretary, who in that anger ticked off the receptionist, who in turn, in that anger went home and told off her son who in that anger kicked his cat. It was obvious that the first man’s reaction was the reason the receptionist’s son’s cat got kicked. The first man might just as well have gone to the receptionist’s house and kicked her son’s cat. The things that cause Angry reactions are not always as a result of immediate stimulus but could be because of an earlier situation.

It was obvious that the first man’s reaction was the reason the receptionist’s son’s cat got kicked. The first man might just as well have gone to the receptionist’s house and kicked her son’s cat. The things that cause Angry reactions are not always as a result of immediate stimulus but could be because of an earlier situation.

The definition of anger is a strong feeling of displeasure. In researching this piece, I tried to find out what makes people get upset (or should I say angry) and there were very many reasons. Some are due to what others do to us, some are due to what we do to others, some are due to what we do to ourselves. The fact is that almost anything has the capability of making us angry.

The first thing we have to recognise if we are susceptible to anger (whether quickly or not) is that we are susceptible to anger. When we tell ourselves the truth on various issues the battle is won. Our manual for living, says when we know the truth, that truth will set us free.

Many years ago, when I was fairly newly married, I used to attend a meeting of older married women once a week and they would offer advice on various topics. it was a good meeting because it opened my eyes to many truths that truly set me free from a lot of issues that were non-issues but I thought differently.

There was another young lady who attended and used to tell us horror stories for example that her husband was sleeping with the nanny and when she confronted him with the information, that he beat the two of them up stating that women were to be slept with. I was horrified by her tales and found them difficult to believe and wondered if they were true why she would stay in that kind of situation. (By the way, this was one of the less horrific tales she had to tell).

Many months later she came to the meeting to tell of how her husband had now turned full circle to be a near model husband. Of course, everybody wanted to know how it happened. She explained that she sat down and examined her own behaviour and many facts that she never told us for example how she beat him up on many occasions and how she refused him many things on many occasions and so on. When she had recognised that she was not the best person to live with she then decided to change and become much better on many levels and low and behold her husband also did a complete about turn.

(Please don’t get me wrong I am not saying being in an abusive relationship is your fault and things are as simple as you changing your behaviour will make everything fine. I am just recounting a true story).

This kind of reset may not  happen immediately but as Einstein said, to continue to do the same thing and expect a different result is nothing short of madness. So going back to anger we should try to put into sets or subsets the things that trigger our anger. (Of course, not everybody has issues with anger). This is strictly only for those who do. So a few examples of the things that apparently trigger anger are, being given a cold shoulder, poor customer service, miscommunication, being accused wrongly,

So a few examples of the things that apparently trigger anger are, being given a cold shoulder, poor customer service, misinformation, being wrongly accused, bad nutrition, a lack of sleep. To be honest the list is endless.We need to come up with our own lists. What the experts say it that we should then work a way around these triggers or at worst, if we can’t avoid them work out a way such that their effect does not turn into a full blown upset.

The things that cause upsets on their own may not be such a bad thing. The problem is the effect they have on situations and people. Our manual for living advises that we should live in peace with everybody as best as we can. This means there may be situations in which you may not be able to live in peace with someone. The plan should be to heed this advice as best as you can.

This is easier said than done. If this was someone you don’t have to live with, then you can do a dance that gets you out of the line of upsets. However what happens if the person is close to you like a family member or a colleague. I am not a Dear Dolly columnist so I am not here to advise you on how to go about it. What I am here to do is to let you know what may happen to you if you don’t heed this advice of finding a way to get out of the line of upsets.

Discord, which is what constant upset brings, is the worst thing you can do to your health. Many terminally ill people are always being persuaded that what they need is peace because the body is made up of flesh, blood and emotions. In many societies, the emotion is not recognised at all. There are many ailments that the doctors don’t know the cause of but many doctors are beginning to advocate that people pay more attention to their emotions.

There is a quick tip from the maker’s manual. Forgiveness goes a long way in healing emotions.Many people say forgive and forget. Well, that is not in the maker’s manual. Forgiveness is there but not forgetting, although it is fantastic if you can forget. There have been many stories of people who have had physical healing once they could forgive an offending party.Even when you are the offending party, emotional healing comes also when you ask for forgiveness.

Forgiveness starts the process of resetting but permanent reset comes with again doing an analysis on yourself once you know the triggers for anger try to avoid them. If you are the trigger for someone else’s upset then you should find a way not to be a trigger.

A major reset button is having some quiet time with Almighty. The world is so noisy that there is never time to be quiet. In fact, too many of us are afraid of being quiet. So many of the things that cause upsets can actually be avoided if we can just get quiet with Him and read the maker’s manual.

During a quiet time, you may want to ask Almighty, how in your own circumstance you can achieve the advice to follow peace with all men as much as possible. There are many issues you can resolve just by asking Almighty for direction during quiet time with Him. I don’t have the answers and let me assure you not many people have the answers for your issues but Almighty can give you answers to the most difficult questions.

It is time to reset. Being in a permanent mode of upset definitely causes all kinds of ailments.

So to recap, know getting upset is not good for you. Think as to what causes your upsets, isolate these things, ask Almighty for how to reset these upsets and then reset.

Oh! My word, am I a failure?


I like to start off with definitions. Before I go into definitions I feel I must explain why I have not upgraded as I announced a few blog posts ago.I have two daughters in digital marketing who assured me it was not necessary and I would not get any points for upgrading… so I have not upgraded the blog site.

I am trying to do only what is necessary. We all, however, know that life is not that black and white. Some things may not be necessary but we do them anyway because we can and because it brings somebody joy (not necessarily us).

Back to the definition. Failure is the absence of success. So what is success? The dictionary says it is the victory or triumph of a thing. The good outcome of a thing. This reminds me of a fact about New york crime fighters.

Apparently, when the anti- drug enforcement team are celebrating a huge drug bust, the anti-vice squad have increased work, keeping all the druggies who need a fix and are going crazy committing all kinds of crimes because the cost of drugs has gone up as a result of the drug bust.

This means that success may not be a universal word because what is recognised as success here may be the opposite in other quarters. So, for example, social media is good on some fronts but terrible on some others. Sometimes what was initially celebrated as a success may end up being referred to as a failure in the long run.

I remember when social media brought down a government , many hailed social media. however, the country where this happened has become war torn and the jury is still out as to the success of the role of social media in the preceding anti-government attack via social media.

There is the example of marriages that go south soon after wedding ceremonies. Before the ceremonies, the families think they have been successful but when they go south they think they are failures. However in the cases of domestic violence even upon separation some families think they have been successful because at least their family member came out of the situation alive and not dead or maimed.

I don’t know if you can tell that this was not the way I expected this blog post to go. I was feeling a little down in the dumps because I don’t yet have a break through on one or two of my projects and was going to have a public pity party. Also, it is almost the end of the year and we tend to make all kinds of assessments at this time.

I am now seeing however that success has many shades and sides to it. So I am not a failure depending on which side of the coin you are looking at. I can comfort myself by saying that I at least started a project. Many are locked in a comfort zone with golden handcuffs and they cannot see they are prisoners. (Again if this describes the always smiling lady at the check out in your favourite store , then I hope she stays there because her smile is what people need sometimes).

I may comfort myself by saying the snail speed of the project does not mean failure as a turnaround may just be round the next bend in the road. I may comfort myself by saying that tomorrow morning is another day for me to change things and turn them around.

There was a king called David many years ago who experienced what he and the people at the time called failure. So,  he committed adultery with the wife of one of his soldiers who was fighting at the war front. When the lady got pregnant , King David tried to cover up by giving the soldier an exeat from the war front to visit his wife.

Even though the soldier came home he refused (from a sense of duty and team playing with his fellow soldiers still at the war front) , to lie with his wife thereby defeating the whole purpose of his been brought back home. This meant that the lady could not pass off her pregnancy as her husband’s. To further cover up King David sent the soldier back to the most heated part of the battle and engineered his death.

He married this lady and she had a baby. The baby eventually died and King David become depressed. He wrote a popular verse asking himself why he was so downcast( so unhappy).

A few pointers here. When you are feeling like a failure you need to acknowledge that feeling and ask yourself why you are feeling thas way. When you think deeply ( again, thinking a dying but important art) you will get answers that will help you move forward. Do not get stuck. Try to retrace your steps to see where you went wrong. The mind is powerful and can play games on you. ( This is true, go and read about the right brain and the left brain).

This project or whatever, may not even be for you. You may need to take another path that you can use your same skills and passion for, but just not this particular thing.Be careful not to be too all over the place. You may be trying to do too much. when I was younger , you got points for “multi-tasking” now we know that even though you may do two things at the same time , you are not likely to do them both at the same level of quality. You may also be killing yourself with stress and cortisol.

Is it possible that you are not looking at the coin from the right angle? So to go back to King David, even though his affair was not a good thing in the end because of introspection , he repented and himself and this lady had a child that is now known as the wisest and richest man who ever lived.

Is it possible that you are not patient enough to see the success that is not visible right now but is actually there? Who do you surround yourself with? This project may not mean much to them but mean the world to someone else. You may be trying to serve the wrong people.

I watched an Oprah show once and she said everybody always wants to now how they had done on the show whenever the show ended, even the most influential people. We are most times so concerned with public opinion. Maybe the public does not know much about much or maybe you are not asking the right public.

This sounds to me like I have said this before in an earlier blog post. Please forgive me if you have heard this before.It is not for you but that person reading this  for the first time.

Apparently, the man who invented the contraceptive pill died a pauper, almost unknown and unloved. Over the years there have been mixed feelings about his invention, which has now been proved to help keep cancer at bay in the women who use it.

When King David had asked himself the hard truth of why he was so unhappy, he made a wise decision to always put his hope in Almighty and always praise Him. Why should he bother with this, after all Almighty was there before his predicament of seeming failure.

He had however read Almighty’s words that say if He (Almighty) is on your side , you may trip seven times but you will always get back on your feet. Almighty’s words are truths that you can take to the bank because they are everlasting.

This is not the time to throw in the towel. Go back to the drawing board. The world is waiting for your input. You are extremely important and precious. Don’t waste your time pity partying. It is an expensive venture and not fulfilling in the long run.

To answer the question, no you are not a failure but a success about to happen.

Physically, Materially, Spiritually!

I must apologise that I seem to have been missing in action last week. I have been travelling with limited internet access. I am tempted to use the excuse that I have been busy but that will only be an excuse and as I don’t like excuses I will not be going down that line.

I am trying to mentor a young man and have been advising him about the virtues of living within a structure so as to make maximum impact for himself. How do you start putting structures into your life and living. There is so much to balance and get right.

Take Physically for example. Physically in this regard means everything pertaining to the body. It is important to put structures up so that your body does not disappoint you in the near or distant future. To be honest, if your body is not where it should be it will be difficult to achieve much in other areas of your life. So this area should include how you plan to feed your body, exercise it, adorn it and give it rest, just to mention some broad parameters.

What you plan to feed it should be carefully considered. With a lot of research (actually only a little research will do), you will realise that there are very many things you can eat that are not necessarily good for you. Even though your ethnicity and where you live and the kind of work you do impacts on the best diet for you, there are some things that universally are not good for you. So excessive sugar is not good for you, regardless of who you are. Sugar makes most people fat (and fat is unhealthy)and even if it does not make you fat, it is still unhealthy. I have said excessive because in our present day world if you were to avoid it completely you would probably have to stop eating everything.

There are also different kinds of sugar, those that are unhealthy and those that are healthy. I can assure you though that if you take even the healthy sugars excessively, they will become unhealthy. I am not going to dwell on the nitty gritty of what you eat, just that you have to think about it and make sure you feel your best when you eat the things you eat. For example, I have noticed that I feel tired and lethargic when I eat some things and very hyper when I eat some other things.

Part of physical structures is exercise and movement. All this adds to the well-being of the body and therefore of yourself. Age can help us define what we do for wise exercise. A few people in their sixties jog but honestly jogging at that age is not necessarily the best form of exercise. What we need to focus on is activity and not necessarily exercise. Exercise gives the impression that a certain time has to be dedicated to this. Activity levels are actually the better thing to monitor than exercise. Do not get me wrong, exercise is good but if you exercise thirty minutes a day (which is what is recommended) and your activity level for the rest of the day is zero, you have not only defeated the purpose but have made that thirty minute exercise harmful because it has deceived you into thinking you are fit when you are not.

Knowing how to manage stress is also setting up structures for the physical part of you. Stress can jeopardise everything else. This involves our sleep patterns and what we do to relax that will not ultimately harm us. For example, some people started watching pornography in order to relax and then they got addicted. I was listening to a Ted talk recently that painted a really gruesome picture of the sorry and sad lives of people who had pornographic addictions. Certainly not the way anybody would want to live. This goes for many addictions that start off as forms of relaxation.

Take Materially as another example. Materially in this context is in terms of material possessions. What is your plan for material things, how do you plan to earn a living. Are you an establishment person, do you want to work in an organisation until you retire? If this is you, you have to decide what kind of job you want to do and in what industry or environment. Many people just find themselves in a certain place. If this is you , you don’t have to stay there. Don’t just walk out please but have a plan. Please know that what you studied in school is not who you are and may not reflect your gifts or passion. If it does, congratulations. If not, don’t be perplexed, this is common. an education only prepares you for living and  should not bind you to your course.

If you are an entrepreneur, be sure you have chosen the right thing to do. The rule of thumb is that you are doing something that you love doing so much, you could do it for free and often do it for free if the need arises.Once you have zeroed in on this, write your vision and think through the strategy as best as you can. There is a truth that you should write your vision down so that all the people who read it can understand it and run with the vision if they are associated with you.

When thinking materially, you will need to do research and keep abreast of what is going on in that area of business and what is current and what is obsolete. Depending on whether or not you are an entrepreneur will determine how much you need to know and how much you need to adjust and balance.

The difference between an establishment person and an entrepreneur is a profile thing, it is not how much you know. To be sure, take a psychometric test. It is a scientific way of knowing where you fall, if you are unsure.

A lot of thought has to go into deciding on so many things. I may have mentioned it in some of my past posts. Thinking is a dying art, and for sure,  you cannot be successful without thinking no matter what colour success is for you.

Finally, let’s look at Spiritually, because I believe this  is the cornerstone that ties all goal setting and plans together but is constantly overlooked because most of us cannot touch or see it. For our purposes, Spiritually here means relating to the spirit or soul, as distinguished from the physical nature. Where, devotion and worship of a higher being emanates.

Does this not just happen? Nope , the spiritual realm exists and it is up to us to tap into where we want to be plugged and remain plugged. The fact that you decide you don’t want to have anything to do with that realm does not mean it does not exist and that the goings on in that realm will not have anything to do with you. As you can imagine there is so much happening in the spiritual realm, truths and untruths exist and we must be circumspect when it comes to spiritual things.

There is so much  happening in the spiritual realm, we must be sure to be plugged into the way, the truth and the life. I can recommend only what I know. The Almighty is the creator of heaven and earth and He saves by grace. It has nothing to do with your behaviour. He wants you to come into His fold but needs you to invite Him in so He can lead you in. He is a gentleman and will not force Himself on you. When you accept Him , all your old sins will be like you never did those things. If you are currently connected to a higher power that terrifies you or controls you by fear, that is not Almighty.

Hooking up with Almighty allows you to leave the heavy lifting of life in His hands and He promises to keep and establish whatever is committed into His hands until the end. He is dependable and serious. Don’t take my word for it. Try Him and see what happens. Just get quiet and ask Him into your heart and thank Him for Jesus His son. His manual says confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and you believe in your heart that Almighty raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.

Once you have done this, if you give Him time every day He will look out for you.

Are these the only areas to set goals? Not at all. You can set career goals within the material sphere. You can set fitness goals within the physical sphere. You can set emotional intelligence goals. You can set social spectrum goals. The number of goals you can set are innumerable. The long and short is that you need a plan in order to achieve. Set up structures that should work for you. Don’t set goals that lock you in with no room to manoeuvre. They are made for you, not you for them.

by the time you are reading this , it will be the first day of the last quarter of this year. A time to set up structure that would have taken root by the end of the year. You will be ahead of those who will be setting goals in the new year. Just do it.

Of Bio-individuality, DNA & Finger Print

The World today is working hard to make us all look alike. People are putting in butt implants, changing the shape of their noses and putting in fake dimples ( to mention a few) just so we can look like that person who carries the dimples well or a big derrière gracefully (even though that is difficult for me to imagine).

Every single person is created as an individual and the innate parts of you cannot be replicated. Those parts of you that really matter cannot be copied. Even if you change your sex or anything else you cannot change who you innately are. You cannot transform yourself into someone else. This is definitely not Instagram’s message.

Do you know that there are over 300 recognised and registered diet formulas in the Western world? (I say Western because there are identifiable records that show this. Needless to say, there are many more diets all over the world that have not been recorded). All these diets have been scientifically proven to work. However, they don’t all work for everybody. You have heard it said that one man’s meat is another man’s poison. Some people lose weight drastically and keep it off while the same diet makes some other people sick as dogs.

Many years ago, I wanted to learn to pray and as with the way spiritual things go, the very next service I was going to attend in church, the minister announced he was going to teach on prayer. I was excited and got out my pen and notebook to write what he was going to say. It sounded great and backed with words from the manual for living, I believed I had got what I was looking for.

Lo and behold the next four services had different ministers all teaching on prayer and their teachings were all quite different. It then struck me that even though there are a few principles of prayer (like praying always through Jesus to the Father) you have to develop your own style of prayer. It is quite difficult praying the same way someone else does. Prayer is supposed to be communication with a dynamic being, trying to pray in ways, not of your own style and design makes praying boring for you and maybe unreal to  Almighty.

This is the same way in which what we are created to do and achieve is as different as there are people. Not every purpose brings fame and fortune. I knew a grandmother who was unassuming and very simple. At her death, a huge women’s and youth centre that she had built was unveiled and commissioned. This was a great achievement in terms of the quality and size of the structure and the many things that the place can be used for. Even though we will remember her for it, she did not get any fame or fortune for her initiative in her lifetime.

There is another person who is a famous computer and business guru (not even as far as computer gurus go today) who spent many years amassing ridiculous amounts of money only to give it out in the millions of dollars. He got fame and fortune in his first initiative and definitely, fame in his second initiative.

There are many people discouraged because even though they have all kinds of creative initiatives none has brought them fame or fortune. Many are wondering what the point of what they are doing is because they can’t see results as they think it should be. There is a story told of a man who Almighty had told to push a table. He pushed and pushed and after a while, he went back to Almighty to say he was going to quit because the table was not moving. Almighty told him to read the instructions again. Almighty said He had instructed him to push the table and not to move it. Do you get it?

So let us take a stay at home mum. Many people (including the stay at home mums) don’t think highly of this job. It is, however, one of the most important jobs on earth. I am not going to write a treatise but a lot of instances (I am not saying in absolutely every case) the children who come from such homes are very well adjusted. The cases where this is not so is usually because the stay at home mum does not herself appreciate her role. She does not focus on it and is constantly looking for a better role while doing her current role half-heartedly.

There was the story of a woman in our manual for living, who won the war for her kinsmen by driving a tent peg through the head of the commander in chief of the opposing army. She lived in an era when she and her family lived in a mobile home that was a huge tent. They moved around often because they went where there was work. She had to help with putting the tent up and taking it down such that she developed an expertise, which may not have been appreciated at the time. By the way, the tents then were not the puny little things we have now but were like present day marquees.

Once when they had just moved and they had just finished putting up their tent, the commander of the opposing army needed some rest, saw a seemingly helpless woman and asked her to allow him to enter her tent and take a nap. She was hospitable to him and not only allowed him to enter her tent for a nap but also gave him warm milk (to lull him into even deeper sleep). As soon as he got comfortable she used her initiative and was strong enough to drive a tent peg into his skull, thereby killing him.

Just from this story, you can tell that she was versatile, strong, hospitable, thinking on her feet and fearless. This is without mentioning her numerous other qualities.

This is the Olympic season and the start of the European football season, so no matter how much I try, I cannot get away from sports even if I tried ( and believe me I have tried). Anyway, I am happy I did not succeed because I have just been loving the way the athletes were prepared and are taking their sports seriously. There was a young chap who won a gold medal and broke a longstanding world record and honestly watching him, he made it seem such a breeze.

I watched an interview he gave and there was a clip of an interview with his seventy-five-year-old female coach. She had also trained many other athletes who have also done many firsts. Guess what, we will never know very much about her, at least not as much as we will get to know about the star athlete concerned.

This is also the same for a lot of coaches who are ready put in a lot of hard work to push others forward for fame and fortune.

Whatever you are doing today is great if you are getting fame and fortune. However, if you are not yet seeing the fame and fortune it is not enough to quit as long as you are adding value.

Do not be quick to be like the Jones. Let me tell you a secret , believe it or not, the Jones are thinking you are worthy of copying.

Remember that you are wonderfully and fearfully made. That just means that you are awesome, beautiful, genius, loving and lovable. Don’t let social media and the noise of the market tell you otherwise.

It is great if you are currently being the best you can be. However if for any reason you are not operating at maximum effectiveness and efficiency, just know that the beginning of every day marks a time when you can turn your life around in the right direction. The manual says joy comes in the morning. So “good morning”, time for joy.

Oh you know I said I could not imagine anyone with a big derrière being graceful, I take that back. I am writing this at the Cape Town South African airport and if you have ever been to South Africa you will see women of various size derrière (implant less might I add) moving gracefully.

I am not speaking against those who implant this that and the other. Almighty is magnanimous and gives us free will and will not stop us from acting out our free will. However the manual tells us a truth that what you sow, we will reap. There are consequences for all our actions so think it through before you act.

Doing Peace!!!

There are so many pressures in our present day world. There is so much technology that  is apparently supposed to make life easier but human emotions are laboring under more stress than ever before.

It is getting so common now to find people getting up and shooting complete strangers dead just because their emotional state is completely stressed out. Remember the story of a pilot who flew an entire plane into the side of a mountain killing himself and every other person on the plane again because he was so stressed out.

More and more we are told it is depression and the doctors say depression may be genetic but that high-stress levels increase the incidence.

This is just one of a myriad of diseases and ailments that have a real connection to high-stress levels. The emphasis here is on “high”. Stress in itself is welcome and very necessary or…

View original post 1,052 more words


Jesus is the Prince of peace: (Isaiah 9:6) – Jesus did not come to bring peace to the world as in the absence of war, but peace between God and man who were separated by sin. He died to reconcile sinners to a holy God.

Even with all the war in the world,  with Jesus PP, there will be peace in your life. Invite Him into your life He will give you peace. He will give you rest, He will give you sleep.

He will give you peace in difficult situations, peace in situations you do not understand, peace in situations of grief, lack and in all kinds of adverse situations.

He is a real person who is still alive today. He is not positive thinking of the universe. He is Jesus

View original post


Jesus is the Prince of peace: (Isaiah 9:6) – Jesus did not come to bring peace to the world as in the absence of war, but peace between God and man who were separated by sin. He died to reconcile sinners to a holy God.

Even with all the war in the world,  with Jesus PP, there will be peace in your life. Invite Him into your life He will give you peace. He will give you rest, He will give you sleep.

He will give you peace in difficult situations, peace in situations you do not understand, peace in situations of grief, lack and in all kinds of adverse situations.

He is a real person who is still alive today. He is not positive thinking of the universe. He is Jesus




Doing Peace!!!

There are so many pressures in our present day world. There is so much technology that  is apparently supposed to make life easier but human emotions are laboring under more stress than ever before.

It is getting so common now to find people getting up and shooting complete strangers dead just because their emotional state is completely stressed out. Remember the story of a pilot who flew an entire plane into the side of a mountain killing himself and every other person on the plane again because he was so stressed out.

More and more we are told it is depression and the doctors say depression may be genetic but that high-stress levels increase the incidence.

This is just one of a myriad of diseases and ailments that have a real connection to high-stress levels. The emphasis here is on “high”. Stress in itself is welcome and very necessary or else we would not be motivated to do anything. It is the stress your bladder puts on your system that sends a message to your brain to tell you to get up and go to the bathroom. If that stress was not there….well there will be an accident. This is just a very simple example of good stress.

Would it not be amazing if we could raise a force field of peace around us every time we feel the stress levels rising. I like superhero films and in particular, a female super-hero      who when she raises her hand a force field (which is like a glass encasement) comes up around her and whatever is coming at her hits the encasement and falls to the ground.

There are many physical things you can do to keep some kinds of stress in check, for example taking note and avoiding those things that trigger stress for you. If for example sitting in traffic increases your stress levels you can make sure you leave before traffic starts or you wait until traffic is over. Or you can find something to do like catching up on some reading or (if you are driving), listening to an audio book when in traffic.

Having a to-do list you create for each day, ensuring that your daily goals align with your lifetime goals also helps to ensure that your life is not as stressed as it is right now. This is assuming that you have set lifetime goals. If not, take some time now to do this.

Eating right and making sure that you get the right amount of sleep and recreation also goes a long was to living a stress-free life. Even something seemingly small like mixing with the right people ,  who build you up not the ones who are always criticizing or who are high maintenance and hectic, who are constantly gossiping and generally bringing the worst out of you…. help you have normal stress levels.

However, there is a more permanent and sure way of keeping stress levels normal. There was a man called Peter who lived many, many years ago who was held captive by a horrible king just because he was preaching what he knew to be the truth. (At the time, there was no freedom of speech, come to think of it there is no true freedom of speech even now).

He was not only jailed but was going to be beheaded the next day. He, however, had the Prince of Peace(PP)  with him and this gave him so much confidence that the night before he was to be beheaded, he was in a deep sleep between two guards. (Let’s face it under ordinary circumstances you would not be sleeping if you knew that on the next day, your head is going to be removed from your body.) When the people sent to rescue him arrived , they had to shake him awake, he was so fast asleep. Peter was so fast asleep because he was very confident that the PP would sort him out either by rescuing him or by taking him quickly to heaven. Any which way he knew he would win.

On another occasion, there were some sailors a boat in rough weather. They  had the PP in the boat with them but they panicked like crazy and went to hurriedly wake him (because He was asleep). When He awoke He just spoke to the waves and wind saying: “Peace, be still”. Immediately the everything became calm.

We have been told in many places in our manual for living that we can do greater things than what He did or at the very least the same things than He did. In order to do this, you must first know Him and ask Him to be your guide.

Once you have done this, (it is so easy because He is actually already waiting for you to invite Him in), you then actually have to invoke peace, tell peace to enter into situations in order for you to see peace in action. Unfortunately, if you don’t speak peace in many situations it won’t happen.

These stories show that even when you have PP in your boat, there may still be storms. The challenge for many is that they are disappointed that even though they have PP they still have storms, they believe this should not be the case. Again the manual for living , says that when we pass through these storms not if we pass, the storms will not overwhelm us.

With PP, stress will come but we have a sure weapon to deflect them before they settle. We can invoke peace and the storms will become calm.

Using myself as an example, I try to do peace often even though I must confess many times I do peace as a last resort after I have rushed to try to sort things out myself using management principles etc. These usually work for a little while before the stress appears somewhere else. When I remember to invoke peace it always works.

“Why do I need to make  PP my guide “, when even with Him in the boat there will still be trials, waves, stress? This is a great question which I may not have the perfect answer for but will try to answer as best as I can from my own experience.

To start with, having PP in the boat means fewer stresses. There is also a great assurance that when the stresses come you have a confidence that they will not cause any adverse effects because He is there. The roaring of the challenges remains just that -a roaring.

What does He get in return, since we have been brought up to believe that there are no free lunches and this whole process is so easy it looks ridiculous. All He wants is for you to be His friend, acknowledge what He is doing and showing everybody who cares to listen, what He is doing in your boat.

I encourage you to invite Him into your boat, do peace when you feel the need to and be rest assured that He is working on your behalf and will speak to you, steering you in the path relatively free of stress.

Ravenous ……. Death!!

The definition of ravenous is ‘being extremely hungry’. The common definition of hunger is a feeling of discomfort or weakness caused by lack of food, coupled with the desire to eat. What makes us hungry? Apparently,it is a secretion from your stomach that tells our brain to tell us that we are hungry. The reason this is important is the fact that if we don’t feel hungry more often than not we will forget to eat or not even feel like eating. Without eating we will die.

Weakness caused by lack of food must also be coupled with the desire to eat. What makes us hungry? Apparently,it is a secretion from your stomach that tells our brain to tell us that we are hungry. The reason this is important is the fact that if we don’t feel hungry more often than not we will forget to eat or not even feel like eating. Without eating we will die.

When we don’t eat nutritious food, even on a full stomach of junk food the secretion will still go to our brains to let us know we are hungry as the body is satiated by nutritious food not processed chemically altered junk that most people eat these days. The short version is that junk food makes us put on weight because this sort of food keeps our brain sending hunger signals. This is however not the focus of this post. Hunger can come when we have both full stomachs and when we have empty stomachs but hunger is there like I said before to keep us from dying.

I have given the common definition of hunger above.Hunger is however not only for food.The other definition of ravenous is having  a strong desire or craving for something. This is where the crux of the matter lies today. What is that thing that you have a strong desire and craving for?

I was at a gathering earlier on today and we played a game which was for someone to start a discussion about what was of real interest to them. We only discussed each person’s topic for a few minutes and then moved on to another person’s interest. What was obvious by the end of the evening was the fact that many had a strong hunger to see certain things done. Things that were so mind blowing that it took us some time to wrap our minds around what they were talking about.

The issue is which one of us is  actually hungry enough to take a step further to satisfy their hunger by doing something about what they were craving after. Finding someone who had the desire to satisfy that hunger.

What are you ravenous for? Okay let me just really be clear I am not talking about  just a hunger but what are you ravenous.What do you have a STRONG craving for? What is the fire in your bones? This thing  must give you discomfort and make you weak. It must be what keeps you up at night wondering what to do about it.

The problem these days is that we are constantly nibbling and we therefore never allow ourselves to get ravenous. Now before people jump down my throat about it not being good not to eat when you are supposed to. True that is the case when we are talking about food but when we are referring to a burning desire to do.

There are a lot of people who are satisfied with eating in dribs and drabs, eating junk. Many people live in an environment of so much plenty  that nobody needs to exert themselves to make anything of anything.

I was recently reading about a man who in his mid- thirties was left with just five pounds and twenty years later is a multi-millionaire. He was so deprived that he became ravenous. He was highly motivated to try to satiate his ravenous hunger. This is not a unique story. There are so many people who had this kind of break. I call t a break because it made them succeed. Let us not debate what success is. It is many different things to many different people.

On his journey, I am sure that he did not take no for an answer. He did not sleep and wake up anytime he wanted. He set a goal and worked all the different steps to achieve the goal. He made the best of what  he had. When he started ‘doing’, he utilised his best effort. Trained himself to ‘do’ his best so as to get the best results. He ensured he zeroed in on his passion. Was not lazy (have I said that before).

Many no longer believe in hard work to achieve anything. This is why people are not ravenous. They do the barest minimum and expect to get so much. The truth is that all hard work brings a profit but mere talk leads only to poverty.

I know I am always setting assignments and don’t even have any means of knowing whether or not you are carrying it out. Great exploits start with hunger, not the ordinary one but ravenous hunger. Assess the level of your hunger. Don’t be easily satiated. you can achieve so much with real hunger.Is it going to be easy to satiate a ravenous hunger? The answer is no. That is not the best reason not to try.

Hardship is good because it makes us ravenous. A mother whose son was killed in a drive-by shooting goes all out to eradicate gangs and gang warfare in her neighborhood. A person who took a visit to a remote part of the Amazon rain forest just on a whim came back, quit his job at Wall street and started setting up schools in remote parts of the world. He currently has 90 schools. I could go on.

I am going to have to upgrade to a better package on WordPress in order to go another step up in this blog writing. I am not the best example but maybe a typical example. This is not the first blog I am going to start and never continue a blog. I therefore, started this gingerly not wanting to spend much money on the set up just in case I don’t follow through. Now that I have followed through so far I am now willing to upgrade.

Can you tell one of the things I am ravenous for? To see people getting off their behinds and living a better version of themselves. When I was younger mediocrity was a bad word.Now it is the order of the day. I strongly believe that enlightenment will help people to be a better version of themselves.I am so ravenous that I write for free, hold free seminars and will go to all sorts of lengths to enlighten and encourage people to be the best they can be. People should know that I life lived deliberately is a fulfilling life.

When you find what you are ravenous for, you must also,  have a desire to be satiated. Bear in mind that without nutrition you will die. In this case, not a physical but spiritual and emotional death. I am talking about great discomfort that will make the quality of your life so very poor. If you are not feeling  top notch it may just be a hunger that needs to be satiated.

I am wishing you a ravenous filled weekend and next week. Do a self-examination. Where are you at? Remember there is nothing you can feed a pussy cat to make it grow into a lion. Are you a lion or a pussy cat. If you are not ravenous you will eventually be spiritually and emotionally dead.



Dogged Diligence!!!

Hmmmmm I must confess I am a little reluctant to write today because I am going through so much, remember I am trying to set up a business outside my comfort zone (another country). I am totally out of my comfort zone and even though I am making some headway, it seems so painfully slow.Okay even as I am writing , I realise that one of my goals has been achieved and that is to start a certification course in health and nutrition coaching. So really , maybe I should not be feeling so down in the dumps.

Another reason why I am reluctant to write today is that I feel I am always talking about the same thing. The definition of dogged is being very determined to do something, even if it is very difficult. The definition of diligent is hard-working and  painstaking.

Today I am therefore saying, be determined to work hard and be painstaking even if it looks or is even truly difficult. I want to assure you that diligence always yields very positive results (except if what you are being diligent about is negative for example being obnoxious).

There is a truth that people who are diligent always end up at the top because they take whatever task, and work it such that they get the best results. There are so some examples of this. I know someone who has had a not so nice neighbour  for years. Initially, he did not want to have anything to do with this lady but after a couple of years, he decided to be nice to her. This was tremendously difficult but over the years, he made an extra effort to say hello to her and ask after her dog. On a couple of  occasions, a pipe broke in her apartment, flooding his own apartment but he went right on being nice to her. She would always have her friends park in his parking space and he was still very patient with her. Once when his friend parked in her space she gave them both what for. He continued  diligently showing her little kindnesses. After eight years of being neighbours, she started saying hello when they met in the corridor. To cut a long story short she actually confides in him now. It transpires that she was going through a hard time. Is this all! I hear you say you say.


This story, is just to show that being diligent may have to be over a long time and the results may not be mind blowing at first glance but they are fulfilling. There is the story of  Paul, who diligently did good things and wrote many books that hold so much truth. He was diligent in living his life for other people but he ended up being beheaded. Why was he diligent and what an awful end!  His writings have however blessed millions of people over the years and will continue to until the end of the world as we know it. Many people are living exceptional lives because of Paul’s dogged diligence.

The truth is that not all we are diligent at will make us millionaires (I am only saying this because  many people recognise success only in monetary terms ). Many people are going to be blessed by what you are doing diligently.There are some things that you will do diligently that people may never even know you for.

So take a parent who is diligently bringing  up a child to be the best they can be.When that child grows up and does amazing things, not many people remember the parent. The fact is that if that child has one or two flaws despite the amazing things, the parents are likely to be the first to be blamed.

Please don’t get me wrong dogged diligence also works well for wanting to become a millionaire or at least get to the top of your game. The top of the game is always a good place to be. Just a note of warning, again I have said this many before if you are at the top just for being at the top sake it may be an empty victory.

Practicing dogged diligence should be our watch word because anything worth getting does not always come easily. There two ways , we can decide to just live on manna. Manna was a food that came from heaven in yet another story I know. This story was that of  a slave nation that escaped captivity and has to go through a wilderness to get to the promised land. In the wilderness, God just rained manna on them. Manna  was  food to keep them nourished on their sojourn. This was good and it came consistently at meals times, they did not have to do any work for it.

When they got to the promised land the manna stopped falling and they had to till the land, plant crops, tend and harvest the crops. The report was that what they harvested was enormous, juicy, plenty and of such variety. This was infinitely more delicious than manna.

Manna is good and very welcome when one is just starting out but it becomes monotonous and not enough to share with others. The promised land was a nicer place to be but required a lot more work in order to be successful.

I am sorry i am still telling you to press on.I am assuming you are already doing something that is out of your comfort zone . It does not matter how simple it can be. Even if it is just drinking water instead of all the fizzy drinks (this makes you healthy and vibrant enough to want to  get up and conquer). I am here to say don’t give up, continue diligently. It only gets better.

How do I feel after writing this? The more relevant question is how do you feel after reading this. I am happy it is out. The piece is as much a message to me as to you. I hope you get it.See you next week. In the time been, have a great weekend.

Ooops sorry, a quick question. How is your emotional health? Check it regularly to ensure you are not sweeping stuff under the carpet that should be swept up and thrown in the bin. If something is upsetting you find someone to chat with about it. Don’t be stoic or a martyr. Our emotions are real, let’s acknowledge them.